The Ultimate Fighter 6.2: Team Hughes=Team Esther?

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I can't say I hate Matt Hughes, but I can't say I love him either. For those of you who don't watch The Ultimate Fighter (wednesdays on spike, you're missing out) I will bring you a little up to speed.

My favorite fighter and my favorite fighter to rag on is Matt Hughes. He is from Illinois, my home state and he was the 9 time UFC Welterweight Champ. He is an awesome fighter, but his constant spewing of Christian cockamamie whenever he takes his mouthguard out is kind of a major existential drag. Anyways, he's coaching one of the two teams on The Ultimate Fighter. The other team is coached by Matt Serra, the current Welterweight Champ. This week on the show, Team Hughes was encouraged by their coach to read the Book of Esther and then tell him which character in said book reminded them of their coach.

COME ON!!

As if that wasn't ridiculous enough, the character he chose to be identified with was that of the book's namesake, Esther. This is how wikipedia breaks down her role in the story:

"Esther saves the day for her people: at the risk of endangering her own safety, she warns Ahasuerus of Haman's plot to kill all the Jews."

He made them read the bible so they would all tell him that he was some kind of "Save all the people" types and then, pretty much verbatim says:

"You know, I'm just that kind of person, I help people. I could go work at a nursing home."

I really have no argument with Hughes' spirituality and choice of herd. But I was pissed that I had to take time away from the only television show I watch in order to glorify himself in his own mind and to make sure that his team agreed with him about how great he is. Especially when he uses Christianity to do it. When will these Jesus people start hearing themselves?

Which brings me to my next point: Mac Danzig is my favorite fighter since George St. Pierre. I haven't seen him fight other than his last performance on the Ultimate Fighter against Joe Scarola, but its not really his fighting that makes me like him. Its mostly because he speaks diplomatically at all times, slept when Hughes handed everybody bibles and most importantly is a VEGAN. I truly hope that he wins this season just so a few people can get into his dietary routine. The food industry entirely, but the Meat and Dairy industries particularly, should be under harsh scrutiny at all times, being a vegan frees you from the fear of not knowing what you're putting in your body. I can go on, but I rail on Hughes for bringing his ethics into the UFC too much so I won't do it. Suffice it to say:

Down with Esther, Up with Danzig!

UFC 76: Paging Mr. Liddell, Mr. Liddell, Please Report to The Octagon

Hello Sportsfans!
First, I must apologize for not posting in over 20 days. My rock stardom/broken hand have seriously interfered with my bloggery and I am sincerely sorry for depriving you of my wit for the past few weeks.

But Seriously. . .

Chuck Liddell's 'performance' at UFC 76 and his consequent decision loss to the "Dean of Mean" Keith Jardine has had me feeling sick for the past 15 hours. Liddell seemed to have taken his prior loss to Quinton "Rampage" Jackson straight to the Club instead of back to the Pit where he could have improved his game. Rather, the Chuck Liddell that fought last night brought none of his trademark Liddell-ism with him. Instead of engaging Jardine in the game of cat and mouse that has worked so well for him against the toughest fighters in the division (draw a punch, return with 50 on the rebound, hunt etc.), Liddell seemed throughout the entire fight to be saving something, which, until the last :20 of Round 3, I really thought he was going to let loose.

But alas, Iceman, you saved us nothing.

There is no disrespect to Jardine here but the statistics had him as a big underdog. Lidell's beaten Tito, Randy (except for that one time) and Babalu (may his contract RIP) very definitively so why then was this relatively inexperienced young fighter, who's also coming off a recent loss to Houston Alexander able to dominate the way he did last night? Only the Iceman knows and if it weren't for the fact that this is his second straight loss, I'd say he'll just head back over to Hackleman's and recreate his technique, but this does not bode well for the former Champ. Will he still get the Silva fight? Will he fight Forrest? What is going on?

UFC Wits readers, I promise I will do my best to explain this shocking loss. . . Until next time, I'll see you at octagonside.

UFC War of the Words: Rogan Vs. Goldberg

It is difficult to type with a cast on. I am pretty much limited to six fingers, one of which kind of hurts to use. As I sit here I am imagining all the things I could be typing had I the full faculties of all my digits at my dsiposal. For instance, I have been brewing in my head a forecast and some commentary for a UFC matchup that will probably never play out but would no doubt be as exciting and dramatic as any title fight.

Of course, I am speaking of Rogan vs. Goldberg (for those not in the know, Joe Rogan is a comedian and former host of Fear Factor and Mike Goldberg is a generic sportscaster, they are the commentators of UFC PPV events).

In this matchup, I would bet everything on Rogan, not simply because he trains and participates in MMA but also because I think Joe Rogan can't stand Mike Goldberg. I cannot tell if the dislike is mutual for Goldberg, it seems as though Golberg was hired to add some 'Legitimate' sports commentary to the UFC, and while I've never met Goldberg I can say that I think he's a total cheesebag.

Rogan is a very sharp and critical commentator who has a great depth of knowledge about MMA and fighters. Goldberg however, seems to cover up his lack of thinking ability and knowledge of the sport by saying things very dramatically. I wish I could give a verbatim transcription of Goldberg's comments on the win of Jeff Monson over Anthony Perosh at UFC 62, but the approximation is something like:

"Oh (long pause). . .Jeff Monson. . .has (long pause). . .rained (super long pause) . . .himself. . .into the (long pause) . . .league. . .of (long pause). . .contentions . . .of the (super excited and relieved) Heavy Weight Championship of the World!"

Let's get down to the matchup, shall we?

Goldberg is a bit taller than Rogan, so I imagine there may be a bit of a reach advantage for him, but I'm pretty sure he probably doesn't have much striking power. On the ground, I imagine he could deliver some damage, were he able to get behind his punches, but I doubt Rogan would let that happen. I'll give him a dirty boxing advantage, simply because he deserves a chance, and I don't want to say that I count him out of the fight because of his blathering.

Rogan I feel would probably be able to knock him out in the first moments of the first round, not simply because he trains but also because, as I stated before, I think he's got a bit of a chip on his shoulder that he's got to work with the guy. I mean seriously, Rogan has an acute wit and a natural educated viewpoint on fighting and Goldberg always sounds like he's trying to keep up with him.

I interviewed my wife on the subject of this matchup. . . here's what she had to say:

UFCw: What do you think of Mike Goldberg?

W: I don't know who that is.

UFCw: He's the UFC commentator that's not Joe Rogan or Randy "the Natural."

W: Oh. Uhm I think he's very monotone with his excitement.

UFCw: That's an interesting analysis, how do you think he would fare in a fight against Joe Rogan?

W: I don't remember who Mike Goldberg is.

UFCw: I just told you like 1 second ago.

W: Oh, oh, I think he would be knocked out in the first thirty seven seconds.

UFCw: So you'd go with Rogan for the win then?

W: Yes.

UFCw: Do you think there is any personal friction between Rogan and Goldberg?

W: Of course! Everytime Mike Goldberg and Joe Rogan talk to the camera and Mike G. says something, Joe Rogan always rolls his eyes, like who is this guy? Okay, we gotta be at this BBQ at 2:30. Can I go get ready?

UFCw: Who's asking the questions here?

At this point my interview subject stormed out of my journalism office to change into BBQ attire and my secretary informed me that the White Stripes had arrived for their interview. I now must devote my entire attention to them as I hear that Mr. White is prone to violent outbursts when he is kept waiting.